bleah
I left work tonight late enough to see the prostitutes out on Sunset Blvd. I made eye contact with one as I was driving by. It felt really weird.
Yes, I was jammed up at the office for 16 1/2 hours today. Work hard now and things will come. Six months later: Work hard now and things will come. Two years later: Work hard now and things will come. Ten years later…
I am more grateful for where I am now than it sounds. But goddamit, I grew up in Internet time (and I rose to where I am in Internet time, so I guess it’s fair enough). In three years’ time, you’re supposed to be a *gazillionaire*, or at least, you’re supposed to feel like you CAN be a gazillionaire, even though you know that nobody is going to, in fact, be one.
My guess is that for everyone, there is a departing point in this work ethic. It doesn’t apply just to dot-com leftovers like me - it’s the foundation of American business (strike up the band, wave flags, rah rah rah). Some people have it more than others, and some don’t have it at all. And losing it is not like a light switch, where one day you’re like “go!” and the next day you’re like, “no!”. It’s more like a slow fade. I see some people get married, and they find their joy in their family. I see others dive into creating other forms of expression, or swallowing popular culture as an escape. And then it seems, for the most part, people seem content to just….be.
I’m not there yet.
The good part about coming home at 2:30 in the morning is that I can stay up until 3 and listen to Howard Stern for awhile. And this evening, I got to leech off of the tech team’s dinner (Indian food, yum).
Oh, I got a parking ticket this morning ‘cos I parked at a meter last night because it was the only space available and I had a headache. I hate parking in my neighborhood. We used to be able to park in the church lot for $30 a month, but they figured they could make more money by closing the lot and only renting out to film shoots. So parking congestion in Los Feliz gets worse, and a parking lot sits empty 28 days out of the month. Nice work!
What I wouldn’t give to be drinking a beer in the center bar at the Palms right now. One more major project to go this week.