right on bro!

So, if you haven’t heard by now….the earth is angry with humanity having produced Van Halen and McDonald’s, and today decided to focus its vengeance on the source.

I was at work when this happened. I was having a conversation with my boss when I suddenly felt some small tremors, and I said, “Weak, I hate earthquakes.” Then the shakes began. I could see the overhead lights swaying back and forth. Somebody at our office exclaimed, “Yeaaahhh!” I had visions of giant cracks opening up in the earth and swallowing us whole, like the Superman movie. But it stopped after five seconds. I sat at my desk doing nothing for a few minutes, and I went outside to have a cigarette.

I hate earthquakes.